A reminiscing of my old Pokemon mystery dungeon story
don’t worry I’ll probably link it later but this is a page for me to look back at my original fanfic and things that I wish I did after looking back through my reread
I’ve currently read through 6.5 and it gave me some thoughts first off I kind of wish I rewrote chapter 2-5 they quite a bit cluncky in the way I wrote them and the grammar is somewhat atrocious as mentioned by some things
I told way to much that Leo is niave an used basically every character in the early chapters to prove that point
I kind of wish I made cutiefly a much more subtle twist villain it was pretty obvious when they said they “wanted the world to go poof” in the first encounter we meet them
I felt I could make the battle with cherubi's gang a little more intense and portray cherubi as a bit more unstable than i did to match up with my explanation
also how i said lilly really doesn't like sharing her name and that scene where she just so easily gave her name to clodsire and then have it revealed by uxie later in the story instead of by her own volition which i think would have made the moment of learning her name for leo and mirage was way more impactful than it was
I'll probably give more thoughts as i read more but this is just a few i have on what i read so far
Comments
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And this is why we edit things.
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just read chapter seven i kind of wish i expanded on the Pecharunt story a bit more treating it more like a flashback tale instead of just being told kind of wish I split it into more than one paragraph and have some Q&A between the characters about the story
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in chapter 8 I mentioned 3 rescue team I wish I could capitalize on those other teams more of team thunder and magic, which only get briefly mentioned I wish I could show the struggle against Pecharunt a little longer maybe even preferred making it two chapters instead of one maybe having more of a riot against the main characters during when people thought they were the cause
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Y'know sometimes when you make a thing you want to change it. And it's okay to do so. Heck rewriting it would make it better. But at the same time being finished with that thing means you get to start something with a new vision and you can make it better by using what you learned.
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I felt moved sitting on an active treadmill
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Yes yes yes
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You know… I still gotta read your Mystery Dungeon story fully, and actually get to seeing what I like and don't like about it. But I can completely understand you wanting to rewrite stuff, as a matter of fact I have gone through a few incarnations of my creations… So there's no shame in changing a few things, or starting from a certain point again!
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